Building Your Secret Escape Fund

Disclaimer: Your safety is the number one priority. This guide offers suggestions, but you are the expert on your own situation. If at any point you feel that taking these steps would put you in danger, do not proceed. Trust your instincts. Contact a local domestic violence advocate or the National Domestic Violence Hotline to create a personalized safety plan.

Why You Need an Escape Fund

Financial control is a key tactic of abuse. An abuser may limit your access to money to make you feel trapped and dependent. An escape fund, also known as a "freedom fund," is a secret stash of money that can give you the resources to leave an unsafe situation and begin a new life. It can cover immediate costs like transportation, a deposit on a new apartment, legal fees, or basic necessities for you and your children.

How to Secretly Save Money

Building a fund when your finances are being monitored requires creativity and caution. Here are some strategies to consider:

Small, Consistent Actions

• Cash Back at the Store: When you buy groceries or other necessities with a debit card, get a small amount of cash back with each transaction ($10, $20). This is often less noticeable than a large ATM withdrawal.
• The Coin Method: Save all your loose change. It may seem small, but it adds up over time.
• Round-Down Your Purchases: If you have a separate account the abuser doesn't monitor, use a banking app that rounds down your purchases to the nearest dollar and transfers the difference to a savings account.

Generating Secret Income

• Sell Items for Cash: You can sell old books, clothes, or electronics to secondhand stores. Be sure to choose places that pay in cash rather than store credit.
• Use Your Skills: Offer to do odd jobs for friends, neighbors, or through apps like TaskRabbit. This could include babysitting, pet-sitting, cleaning, or running errands. Always prioritize your safety when meeting new people.
• Donate Plasma: Certified plasma donation centers pay for your time. This can be a way to earn cash that is not tied to a traditional paycheck.

Other Creative Methods

• Prepaid Gift Cards: Purchase Visa or Mastercard gift cards with cash. These can be used like a debit card and are easier to hide than cash.
• Ask for Help: Confide in a trusted friend or family member. They may be able to hold money for you, or you can ask for small loans or gifts.

Where to Hide Your Escape Fund

Keeping your fund hidden is just as important as building it. Here are some ideas:

With a Trusted Person

The safest option is to give the money to a trusted friend or family member who the abuser does not know well or would not suspect. This removes the risk of the abuser finding it in your home.

A Secret Bank Account

Opening a new bank account in your name only can be a powerful step. Here's how to do it safely:

• Choose an Online-Only Bank: These banks often have no physical branches, which can make them harder for an abuser to discover.
• Use a Safe Address: Do not use your home address for statements. Use a P.O. Box, a trusted friend's address, or enroll in paperless statements sent to a secret email account.
• Create a Secret Email: Set up a new email address that the abuser does not know about. Use this for all communication with the bank.
• Do Not Download the App: Do not download the bank's mobile app on a phone the abuser has access to.
• Access Your Account Safely: Only check your account on a safe computer, such as at a public library or a trusted friend's house. Always use private browsing mode.

Physical Hiding Places

If you must hide cash at home, be creative:

• Hollowed-Out Books: These can be purchased online and blend in on a bookshelf.
• In a Sock Drawer: Roll up bills and place them inside a pair of socks you rarely wear.
• In the Freezer: Place cash in a sealed, waterproof bag and hide it in the back of the freezer.
• In a Child's Room: An abuser may be less likely to search through a child's belongings.

Important Safety Reminders

• Digital Footprints: Be aware of your digital footprint. Clear your browser history, use private browsing, and be cautious about what you search for on shared devices.
• Have a Backup Plan: Think about what you would do if your escape fund is discovered. Having a plan in place can help you stay safe.
• You Are Not Alone: Building an escape fund can feel isolating, but you are not alone. Reach out to a domestic violence advocate for support and guidance.

This guide is the first step toward reclaiming your financial independence. Every dollar you save is a step toward a safer future. You are capable, resourceful, and deserving of a life free from abuse.